How to Address Report Cards, Grades With Kids

End-of-year report cards will soon be coming out.

And the has some tips for helping parents talk to their kids about their report cards and set goals for improving grades in the future.

The provided the following account on handling learning goals in your household:

If your child had any school difficulties this past year, report cards coming out may be a touchy subject at your house.

However, as Christine Tilles of the Lake in the Hills Huntington Learning Center says, parents can use report-card time as an opportunity to talk openly with their child about summer learning goals.

"The most positive approach to having a report-card discussion with your child is to use it as the basis for setting objectives for summer and beyond," says Tilles. "We encourage families to use this constructive tactic because it takes the focus off of the report card and grades and instead helps students and parents plan ahead for improvement. This not only helps students feel supported, it eases the anxiety around the whole topic."

With report card in hand, Tilles encourages parents to ask their child these five questions while setting summer learning goals together:

What grade(s) are you most proud of? This question gives your child the opportunity to discuss his or her favorite classes and teachers and is a great way to begin the report-card conversation on a positive note. It also helps you understand those aspects of your child’s school experience that give him or her the greatest sense of pride. Your child’s answers may surprise you. Perhaps his or her proudest grade is not the A in an easier subject, but the B earned in science, because it was a class in which he or she worked extra hard.

What classes did you find the most difficult this year? Why? Asking your child to tell you where he or she struggles the most allows him or her to reflect on what it is about certain classes that he or she finds challenging. When it comes to the reasons, your child may bring up a teacher’s teaching style, his or her struggle to stay focused or concentrate, or something else entirely. Listen without judging. And if your child has a tough time articulating, talk about each class specifically and ask open-ended questions. You should always ask your child’s teacher for more details, too.

What would you like to work on this summer? This opens the floor for your child to ask for help - whether he or she needs to work on study skills, bringing up grades or not procrastinating. It also creates buy-in on your child’s part. He or she is more likely to work toward goals that he or she helped set. 

How can I help you achieve your goals? Goal-setting is closely linked to student achievement. However, setting goals and hoping your child will define the steps to achieve them all on his or her own is not the way to set him or her up for success. Even asking this question lets your child know that you’re in it together, but be sure that your child knows you are willing to work together to help him or her make progress this summer. That support and encouragement will boost your child’s self-esteem and motivation.

Is there anything else you’d like to talk about? Open communication is one of the keys to a great parent-child relationship. There may be other things affecting your child’s school performance - problems with friends, anxiety about things at home or other life changes - and he or she needs to know that you are always available to listen.

Although report cards can bring about stress, they present opportunities for parents to help their children progress and improve, too. "One of the best ways to help your child succeed in life is to teach him or her that no challenge is too great to overcome," says Tilles. "A bad report card may be disappointing to you as a parent, but by letting your child know that you want to focus on the plan forward and not dwell on the past, you’ll be sending exactly that positive message."